I am human. I am imperfect. This is my journey Life is short. Live it. Take more risks. Be bold but honest. Be humble in the face of success; be courageous in the presence of risk or failure. This is my outlet to remind and encourage me (and you) to be better, push harder, embrace change and grow.This blog is my muse and my journal. My objective is to live a full and colorful life, be creative and humorous, to observe and listen, and enjoy the company of others that embrace this perspective fully. If you share these objectives, feel free to tune in.
If you want to follow my imperfect lifestyle follow tobeimperfect on Twitter
I just got the premier issue of Afar magazine. I love it. It's not like any other travel magazine I've subscribed to (and I subscribe to alot). Check it out at www.afar.com You can read the story of Mark Salvador who literally lives out of a suitcase. He sold all of his eartly posessions but for the ones you see in the picture. I'm not sure how he can live without physical books though.
A friendly Kiwi turned me on to these guys. This one hits home. Understand that Michel Gondry directed. Looks like it.
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I took a workshop with Linda and Charlie a year or so ago and I'm on their email list. I recommend you look at some of their relationship books on Amazon.com A great couple with lots of incredible advice to share. I received this email from them and wanted to share. I've always felt something was absurd about how involve ourselves in lifelong relationships - it has seemed like a sales (con?) job which is highly likely to end up in buyers remorse. I think Linda and Charlie hit the nail on the head as to what's wrong and how we can make it right.
The idea that marriage can or should provide something beyond material and familial security is much newer than most of us realize. It is no more than a few generations old and in much of the world, still doesn't even exist. An emotionally and spiritually fulfilling relationship that is based upon both individual and shared commitments challenges each partner to know their own values, priorities, and intentions in a way that may have seemed irrelevant or unnecessary to our recent and distant ancestors whose main concerns were more focused upon survival issues and the fulfillment of the family's basic needs. Having the "luxury" of seeing your relationship as a means personal fulfillment is a concept that is much newer than most of us realize.
We have very little in the way of historical tradition to provide us with the necessary tools and wisdom for this process..... Fortunately, however, there are some general principles for the creation of conscious partnerships that can serve as general guidelines for those intrepid travelers who traverse the territory of the heart. One of these principles has to do with the willingness to bring honesty, authenticity, and integrity into the relationship from the very beginning.
This means defying the notion of putting our best foot forward in order to attract the partner of our dreams and instead offering a more integrated and whole picture of who we actually are, rather than a picture of the person that we think our prospective partner will find most attractive. This doesn't mean that we focus exclusively on our deficiencies or shadow side, but rather that we acknowledge its existence and don't try to deny that we are imperfect beings. The devil, as they say, is in the details, and in this case general statements like "I'm not perfect' or I have my faults too", doesn't quite cut it. Without going into unnecessary minutiae, specifying the nature of our shadow side as well as our virtuous and more noble side (which many people find it even harder to acknowledge) is perhaps the quickest and most effective means of determining whether someone is attracted to a possibly distorted picture of who we are or a more accurate one.\
The tendency to project an idealized image onto our partner in the early stages of romance is already strong, and such distorted projections can set us up for feelings of disillusionment, disappointment and betrayal, if they are not challenged or at least questioned.
One way to neutralize this possibility is to put a more balanced picture of ourselves up front, one that not only reveals our dark as well as golden aspects and tendencies, but one that expresses our deepest intentions, rather than our more superficial desires for our relationship. While this may disturb or even repel potential partners, it may serve to entice those who can appreciate such honesty and can respond to it reciprocally. If we don't take "rejections" personally, but simply view them as mis-fits, any response or even non-responses will be viewed as valuable information rather than a personal assessment of our character. What follows is an example of what such a self- characterization can sound like when it is delivered at the beginning of a relationship with the intention of setting a context of honesty, authenticity and integrity.
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